Head to head with my little bear

I sometimes get overwhelmed with the impeccable standards we put on ourselves as parents. I know that it is one of the greatest and flattering gifts God could give, and therefor I don't want to let God or my family down. I have had "mommy guilt" off and on for a while now, regarding numerous things. First of all, my heart yearns for another baby, but when I think about dividing my time and attention, I get mom guilt like crazy! Noah loooooves his attention and our days are dedicated to making him happy and playing with HIS toys in HIS house. I know intellectually that it would be soo good and humbling for him to get a sibling and he would learn oh so very much but hey I can't help but just get worked up sometimes. Noah I just want you to know that I love you beyond words and you have made my life something I never thought it could be. I tear up just thinking of the place you have in my heart and how much we have been through already in life. We are so bonded and you will ALWAYS be my baby. I am soo proud of who you are. I know that I have to remember that God is good and if He leads us to it, He will lead us through it! Amen. :) I love you boo!

The 3 of us & the Oregon Coast ~

Bubbuh you were just shy of two years old and I was in need of a break from school and your dad was in need of a break from his grueling work, so he planned a weekend get-away to the Oregon coast for a family trip full of quad riding, pool and water park fun, and of course a room RIGHT on the beach with a perrrfect view of the sunset. Soo sweet and perfect choice Babe. You were soo excited to find your freedom on the beach and run free to the ocean's edge. You got as close as we would let you and would have ran all the way in if we were dumb enough to allow it. ;) You decided that it would be okay to hold my hand and let the waves crash against your knees and brush your cheeks. You didn't care how cold it was... you are such a little water baby, and Noah James you are soo brave. I love seeing you experience things for the first time. I think that is one of motherhood's biggest gifts. Witnessing this little happy human being see water, and sand and food and trees and EVERYTHING for the FIRST time in their life. We as parents can either take it for granted or embrace the blessing it is with grace and thanks and make it as special as it should be for our little ones. Anyway, Dad enjoyed the quad ride in the vast Oregon dunes and got lost in his world for a little while, as we got lost in ours in the small grains and very cold water. You finally realized that umm it wasn't warm... and ummm, you were kinda freezing! haha we got you stripped down, bundled up, and into our heated car faster than you could say "burr" and let you play with your cute toy four wheeler that matched daddy's real one. You looooved matching Dada. Our hotel had a mini indoor water arena for kids, so we spent one of the evenings in there. There was a little kiddy pool as well, which you loved. It apparently wasn't enough however, and you kept trying to jump into the deep end of the big pool!!! Eeeek how many gray hairs am I going to have by the time I'm 30?? Mwahah. Well it was a very special trip and life should be full of short special get-away's. I LOVE our family of 3.